Kissed by a Jellyfish….in China.

Theres always been this crazy saying that says something like: we should never swim in the ocean if you cannot see your hands below the surface of the water…. you never know what might be lurking in those murky waters.

Well I fully agree now with this crazy saying, after the adventure I had.

You see, it started off with a simple vacation to one of the beaches here in China. From the pictures the beach looked amazing and O.M.G, the water looked so inviting….but there’s also a thing called the great PHOTOSHOP. Yep, the beach looked nothing like the photo’s…SURPRISE!!! But anyway, we still had to make the best out of it though, that being said it was a perfect day for the beach, the sun was out, it was a bit hazy but none the less, that is the norm in China, and the water was cool.

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There were people swimming, and jumping off those man-made floatable dock thingy’s and laughing, and riding jet ski’s and on floaty’s, they were doing the water-bound obstacle course, and in general having fun in the water, so not much convincing was needed for me to assume the water was safe to swim in. We were in a group of friends, so half of us were already in the water, while the other half were taking selfies of course and wondering the beach. Firstly, I dangled my feet off the docks just testing the water, okay fine, seemed cool which would totally be fit for this summer heat. Later after a few minutes and a brave encounter, I decided to take the leap, and boom, dived straight into that ocean which was all good. The ocean was a lot saltier than other oceans, and not too sure if it’s the color of the actual ocean itself or from the pollution but it was like a dark green/ black color.

Everyone else was swimming, so it must have been okay and safe to swim right? Oh boy if only that was true, a few minutes later I swam into a huge white Jellyfish that was hovering near the rope, now if I had been able to see my hand below the surface of the water I would have been able to spot the jellyfish sooner and would have avoided it completely. But that was not the case, I practically hugged it as I came up for air, not knowing I had swam into it, until I got up to the surface and realized I had squishy like gooey stuff on me. Not thinking much of it, I stood up and began to take the white stuff off…. and then it hit me….. Oh shit this stuff that looks like and feels like bookies (snot like) was actually a part of a jellyfish. Now the first reaction was to stay calm and move away from it, but me being a dramatic goofball turned around right back into it instead of moving away, I still blame the visibility for that one, and so the jellyfish took its opportunity again and stung me on my ass too. Only after the second sting did it show itself and its true colors…. it was huge and white……and by this point my mind was like….” holy shit, you’ve just been stung by a fucking Jellyfish ahhhh time to bring in symptoms and irritate your skin with redness and a burning like stinging sensation”.

The first thing was to remove every piece of it off of me, I tell you it was a mission. It stuck to me more than once and latched onto some places like a madman, by this point it had a weird stinging sensation. Now after removing all of it….I stayed for a few minutes after that in the salty water washing myself off for the millionth time only thinking that it had just grazed my arm. Soon I hurried back to the hotel to take a proper shower and then did I only realize the aftermath that it had left. On my arm and lower back it left like little red bumps, almost looking like a rash and well on my ass it looked like I had been beaten with a whip. It left deep like lashes that almost looked like I had been attacked by some wild animal with claws, and man oh man did it sting and burn like hell. So after getting checked out and thanking my lucky stars that it was not a poisonous jellyfish and that it wasn’t too serious I saw my other friends and the panic state they were in, only to realize that they too had been “kissed by that same Jellyfish”. And you know how they say that if you google your symptoms you land up going to be dying in the next four hours ect or something silly like that, so they were in panic mode deluxe. At this point I had to laugh at their reactions.

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And that is the story of how I was “kissed” by a huge-ass Jellyfish in China. Lesson learnt for sure.

XOXO

C.v.T

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Embrace the process. Honor the Journey.

There are times in life when you fall down, you keep getting up but you fall back down constantly and the struggles are real to get back up. But the fact that you get back up should be enough.

“Fall Down 7 times – Stand up 8.” – Japanese Proverb 

Change is NEVER easy. People can make it look easy, but we don’t know the struggles they face, we call them the BRAVE but deep down they chasing their hearts, their dreams their future with passion, tears, laughter, stress, fear, judgements, willingness and perseverance to create a future they crave and a life they love.

“Who you spend time with is who you become.”

We have goals, desires and so on. But what stops us from beginning that journey? one word, four letters: FEAR! We fear rejection, we fear change, we fear faith and many more things, we tend to give up before we even start. Time after time we hear the same bullshit excuses as to why we cannot accomplish our dreams, we become confined to our comfort zones but long for freedom.

We become volunteer victims to our own blind side, we get knocked down and that’s it, we fear getting back up.We throw our destiny into someone else hands and let them take control of our lives. We let them own us and control us, why ? because we are the ones who fear to stand back up. And I am not saying that it is not okay to quit or to give up at some point, because we all do it, but it is not okay to keep on quitting, to keep on giving up. NOPE, in order to succeed we need to learn the hard way, we need to realize that fear is an illusion, we need to remember that fear breaks us but also creates a beast, it makes you stronger and you might not realize it right away, but it does. The more we fall and stand up the stronger we become, the more we pursue our destiny and create a life we want, the more we start to enjoy the process. Yes, there will be tough times, sometimes more tough times than good times, and yes we will become fragile, we will lose hope and think why me? But the one question we should keep on asking ourselves:

WHY DID WE BEGIN IN THE FIRST PLACE? 

Are we ready to let go of it all, and start again at some point from the start? Are we ready to give it all up? Just to start all over again….

Sometimes it happens, we tend to lose sight of our goals and go completely off course. I for one know how it feels to fail, to give up and to be lazy. I have been through the stage where I done it over and over again. I lost my motivation, I lost the meaning of the process, I rejected my journey and let myself fall into the path of destruction. I thought in life we needed to party constantly to have fun, my healthy lifestyle, ppphhhffftttt why keep it up? when I had already achieved half of my goal, my first blog I created, I gave up because I became lazy, pursuing my career… nope, I rather spent that money on partying and shopping. Until one day it hit me. Is this what I wanted to make of my one life? is this what I desired the most? Is this what I am ? My answer was NO and it changed me completly, I needed that alone time, that pressure from my self, that mirror talk, I needed me to realize what I was doing. I took “ME” time to process my life. The peer pressure, the negative vibes, the party animals, the thought of having all the time in the world … was my mind shift. I was killing time, wasting it on nothing. Becoming the person who I was not, cracking under pressure and falling into a confined bubble. Sure I can save all the money, I can party all I want, I can live a habit that wastes time but does it buy back the time? No, time is not recyclable and that changed everything. My mindset shifted. I knew this time round I was bound to create the life I want…. MY LIFE.

PRESSURE BUILDS DIAMONDS BABY!!! 

You have got to push yourself today, you have got to realize that at some point you need to set your mind set  for yourself, you need to become you in ways that you scare yourself and scare your haters even more, that you become the person who inspires you and other people. You need to push yourself, to fall in love with your progress, it is the key to your happiness and greatness, to honor your journey and most importantly to become the person you want to become. Stop bitching and whining about why you are stuck in the same place, when you are doing nothing about it, stop falling down and not getting back up, stop assuming challenges are too difficult and start achieving your goals. Get rid of the negative vibes, the bullshit excuses the extra weight as to why you cannot achieve your goals, get rid of the thought that only the rich will succeed or the perfect people will make it. Just say FUCK IT, and achieve your dreams, live the one life you are given to your custom.   DREAM IT, CREATE IT and LIVE IT. You will thank yourself oneday.

BE A LEGEND. LEAVE A LEGACY. 

 

What will your legacy be?

XOXO

C.v.T

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JET-LAGGED , China and Chopsticks…

Well as many of you know that jet-lag can be a real pain in the ass when it wants to be. Sometimes it hits you six love and other times it’s a walk in the park, no matter how many international trips you have traveled sometimes jet-lag just has no chill.

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About two months ago I traveled from Bangkok to South Africa back home and it was a pleasant flight might I add, little to no turbulence, the food was great and the staff very friendly and accommodating. Skip 5 hours back in time and I arrived in South Africa perfectly fine, hardly no jet-lag and carried on as normal. Now fast forward two months and I’m on a flight to China, a 13 hour flight to Hong Kong (in which I had the whole row of seats open next to me, so I slept pretty well) which is super beautiful, a day layover there in which I explored the city a bit and another late and delayed flight to China. Well I tell you that didn’t go so well. There was turbulence almost the entire way and jet-lagged snatched me right up in its destructive path.

It was a whole 4 days of tiredness, moodiness, loss of appetite, waves of nausea and I felt as if I was on an emotional rollercoaster. This has yet, been by far the worst jet lag that I have experienced so far. They say there is no cure, but to just get some rest and stay dehydrated, well that didn’t seem to work. I honestly questioned myself on how stupid I was to make this decision, but I don’t regret it.

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Well the famous China ladies and gents, is not at all a walk in the park. In my opinion I thought Thailand and South Africa had the crazy drivers but I might just be a tad bit wrong on that opinion. Forget that thing where a pedestrian has the right of way on a designated zebra crossing. Nope that does not exist here. Here in China it doesn’t matter if it’s your turn to cross the street or if you are at a pedestrian crossing, it will always be the cars, the funny scooter things and the bicycles right of way first and ALWAYS. Trust me I learnt the hard way trying to cross the street, I waited for the arrow to show me that it was my time to cross, little did I know that you have to look 360 degrees at all angles, because you see there’s a smaller lane in which I assume the yellow famous bicycles use and the scooters and then there’s the other 4 lanes in which the cars use in both directions and then there’s that smaller lane again. And boy oh boy if you don’t look all the ways for turning cars or whatever they are up to you will get hit. You can be half way across the street already and if a car is going to turn it will turn in front of you no matter what. In general they don’t speed too much except at an intersection and going around a corner, I noticed that they love doing the whole speed thing then. The funny thing is it looks totally like the drivers are all in sync with each other, a few honking here and there but not too much, if you are turning just ride straight onto head-on traffic, no worries you will be able to push your way into your desired lane. Don’t feel like waiting in line then just make a new one. It’s that simple apparently. All in all, I have survived most heart attacks from the roads, the food is great and the people are amazing, the foggy air is here and I have already fallen in love with this place, no matter how much bullshit and struggles it already put me through in my first week of being here.

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A haze lingers in the air constantly. 

The language has been a major issue regarding communication but I have met such amazing people who just constantly try to help me all the time. They have been such blessings. The biggest struggle with eating here have been those lovely chopsticks that are used everywhere. Yup, I suck completely at using chopsticks and of course I cannot just have a knife and fork anytime I want mainly because there are only chopsticks available. Well like Alli says,”it’s as hard as learning how to speak English and learning how to swim”.Right now I cannot agree more. It has been a huge struggle and of course all the chinese people think its adorable and cute, well I know I need to find a fork somewhere at some point with these chopsticks stories. The food is really delicious, I have tried some traditional Chinese food and it has been amazingly delicious. Those famous dumplings are so yummy. I am super excited to try more dishes, and you haven’t eaten real Chinese food until you’ve eaten it from real Chinese people I’d say.

Xoxo

C.v.T

These people
So amazing to meet these wonderful people. 

 

An open letter to myself…it’s okay to grieve how you need to.

The thing about being you, is the different people you become every time you travel and move. People expect you to stay the same, they expect you to go back to promises you made when you were a different you, they want your time and constantly crave your attention. But you, you are different now, you let go of the girl you once were, it’s easy to fall in and out of many relationships and friendships, you see the world and people in different ways now….and you crave other people and places all the time, Home just isn’t home for you anymore.

You miss the other countries food, but you still love the potato salad and bubblegum milkshakes back home, you can’t seem to shake the feeling that this time next week you are eating different foods again. Its exciting and draining at the same time, thinking about the move again, you crossing my mind always as I prepare to leave again. It’s starting all over from scratch, the big new city, a different language all together, a new home, meeting new people and making new friends. It’s exhausting thinking about it even, but it’s what you pursued. It’s what you have been pursuing for a while now. You dread the long flights and layovers but you won’t be alone just yet, so that still gives you a sense of peace, I mean when was the last time you spent “time alone”? You can’t even remember.

The first few weeks of being back home were a blur, two years later and I still blamed myself for not coming home to your funeral and spending three weeks at home only, after being away for so long. I know you told me to chase my dreams and follow my heart, but you were my everything. I remember getting the phone call that afternoon, I could sense something was wrong the entire day, I knew you had let go the good fight and you went home. I was emotionless, I cried but I was angry, angry at you for leaving me so soon, angry at myself for leaving too. It was so hard to accept it, I didn’t want it to be true, especially being thousands of miles away again. I remember the things you taught me, the life lessons you showed me, the paths to follow that showed me how to be a better person. And although you were tough (the real German) tough, you made me the strong independent woman I am today. You are still my biggest inspiration and pillar of strength. When asked about who the biggest role model in my life is? It’s still you Gran and it will always be you. You might have been disappointed in me for grieving like I did, but it was so hard to come to terms with, I was in denial and the only thing that numbed the pain was the alcohol. I didn’t care anymore, it changed me as a person again. I became tougher, I didn’t care who I hurt or who I was hurting in the process. I rebelled with a cause, I looked for comfort in all the wrong things, I became a party animal, I loved all the wrong things. When I realized what I was doing, I learned to accept the facts of it’s going to be extremely hard to lose someone you love when you’re thousands of miles away, you are going to grieve in ways that you need to, whether it’s asking God a million questions, screaming in an open field, finding comfort in things that are crazy or picking yourself up from the bathroom floor at 3am.

However you decide to grieve, you do it, don’t let others tell you what to think or how to react you need to find the strength on your own again. It got easier for me after I got your tattoo 2 years later, I remember the times you told me to always be me, and to never give up on my dreams and goals. I remember I made you proud no matter what stupid shit I got up to and I remember that even though you not with me in person you are always close to me. I couldn’t have thanked the people enough that were around for me at that time , they were like stars sent from above. I shut the world out, but one person crept under those walls, they will always have a special place in my heart till the end, I became reckless and didn’t care what I was doing. I needed the time to heal and I have, I am at peace with it now, I let go of the negative bullshit and started focusing on me and the positive vibes.

I accept that there are so many things in life beyond your control, take the time you need to grieve, and learn to forgive…. it lifts a huge weight off of your shoulders. Don’t care what other people think of you, its their opinion and theirs alone, and don’t let someone hold you back, ever. Go out there and create a life that you dream of, and remember some days it is okay to give up and give in, but don’t make it a regular thing.

xoxo

me

CVT